I read through all the previous suggestions and as I'm thinking "THAT would never have worked with MY daughter" it made me realize that likely you're the best person to answer your own question. What you know is that what you've tried hasn't worked... so stop doing what you've been doing and just start experimenting with some new strategies. Every child is different. That said, I'll share with you how we approached what other people call the "terrible twos"... we had terrific twos... it was a really fun time. And our threes have been equally good..
I think two year olds need to argue with mom and dad, need to see what happens when they fight with you and/or throw a tantrum, cry or scream. They're experimenting with the power of language and all kinds of non-verbal communication. They NEED conflict and they need to be taught how to resolve conflict AND they need to be taught how to get what they want and need - how to "negotiate the system" as it were. That said, you can choose to live and teach all those lessons out in the form of "real" conflict or you can create a little conflict when you're not trying to get her dressed in the morning.
If my daughter started getting uppity with me, I'd ask her if she felt like she needed to have an argument with me. She'd usually say yes and then I'd ask her what she'd like to argue about. She would say something like, "I say I want to go to the playground and you say I can't go to the playground." So we'd have a little mock argument about going to the playground and I'd teach her how to compromise and/or otherwise reach resolution when we disagreed. It was SO much easier appeasing her need to argue when it was invented and not about something I was trying to get her to do.
At two and a half, reverse psychology worked GREAT on my girl if it was about practical stuff we were trying to get done. (I NEVER asked questions that could be answered by a "yes" or "no" - you're just asking for a "no" unless the question is "do you want ice cream?" If you want to practice "yes" only ask questions like THAT ;) For example, I could say, "I'd appreciate it if you waited to get dressed until AFTER I put on my shoes, so whatever you do, don't put on that dress." She'd stop what she was doing and run and toss the dress on. I could always pause and say, "Oh you stinker!" She needed to exercise her will and desires and if her desire was to oppose us, how better to do it than using the potty chair or getting dressed?
The first time my girl said, "no" we bought her a very sweet little pull toy that we named "No No." IF she said it after that, we'd just say... "oh yeah, good idea, why don't you go get No No." We totally disempowered the word by making it into an actual toy. I was very careful to only use the word "no" firmly and harshly very, very sparingly (meaning less than once a week and ONLY when her safety was at issue.) There are lots of way to say "no" that don't involve that word.. (later she got a toy called "maybe" and later still came "yes, Ma'am")
Spend more time teaching her the behaviors you want and praising and rewarded good and expected behaviors and less time focusing on unwanted behavior.
In terms of tantrums, my daughter has had fewer of those than I can count on one hand and she's nearly four. From the time she could really comprehend I would say, "no one gets anything in our house by whining or crying. If you're frustrated and you need to cry, I'm happy to hold you, but you're not getting anything by whining or crying." When the whining and or crying would subside, I might teach her how to better communicate or talk about her frustration/anger. Don't make crying wrong, just don't reward it.
My girl gave up naps when she was two and that eliminated any bedtime drama. We made the bedtime ritual sweet and fun, because, frankly, I wouldn't stand for a fight every night for the next 18 years. Screaming and crying NIGHTLY has to be doing damage to your relationship. My girl is in bed having three stores read to her (which she loves picking out) by 7 pm. After the story is over I hop into bed with her, turn out the lights and we cuddle until she falls asleep (usually within ten minutes.) You can turn the night time ritual around, just experiment with ways to make it sweet and loving and a cherry on a day, even on the worst day. It'll be so good for both of you to have days end better - but ONLY you can change the equation and you need to experiment.
I know.. long answer... hope something in there helps. Don't buy that this has to be the terrible twos... choose your battles and remember it's about teaching, not disciplining.. and if she's not learning, you need to switch up your teaching style..