Timeout=restraining child?

Question

A mom was asking for advice regarding timeout with her toddler...one poster replied with:

"I"m a fan of restraining my child. He tends to act out and hurt himself and others when he's angry. So we keep a spare carseat in the living room and when he's bad he has to sit in it and be buckeld in. Sometimes I have to force him into the carseat but it works. He can't hurt himself or me and he can't get up till he's been quiet for 3 mins. "

What do you mom's think of this? Is timeout the same as restraining? Is this okay?

Answer 1

Some parents think they need to restrain a child to get them to stay put in time out. If this is the case, they are doing timeout wrong. A parent should not need to restrain a child to get them to stay in time out.



There are certain steps to doing a proper timeout, and some parents do not know them and some do not follow them. Many parents think timeout does not work, simply b/c they do not do it right.



If you are having to hold your child in timeout then you might as well not do it at all. Your child should listen to you b/c you are the parent, not b/c you are physically holding them in timeout.



However, without really knowing the poster you are quoting, it is hard to comment on the situation. If he is physically hurting himself and other people, then he may need to be restrained. I would not advocate restraining a child in a car seat for a certain amount of time though. It does not sound as if he is being restrained as a method of stopping him from injuring himself, but as punishment, which I think it wrong. There are other ways to teach a child not to hurt themselves in anger.

Answer 2

I have a friend who is a behavioral therapist and we've talked about this when discussing timeouts. She actually recommends this for a child who may hurt themselves or others. She didn't say carseat but highchair or similar. Personally, I could not do it but my son isn't a threat when taking his timeouts. I guess I would have to be in that situation to say for sure.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

I think that is wrong beyond wrong! Regardless of the situation.



If a child is acting out in that kind of manner then there is something obviously wrong with the child (mentally) or he has had a bad upbringing. (kids don't get violent and act like mental patients just because they want to. They have to be raised in that kind of enviorment)



A parent should know how to handle their child's temper tantrums the CORRECT way which is not using restraints to put them in their place.

Answer 5

i'm not sure if this is the right way to go about it